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Friday Fun: History Trivia And Comment

March 16, 2007

On this day in . . .

– 1836, “The Republic of Texas approved a constitution.” … Texas has received a lot of bad press recently, including news today about a guy – with no priors – in prison for 17 years for failing one marijuana drug test while on probation. If I were a guy who liked to step on a state while it’s down, I’d joke that Texas approved its militant, human-rights-hating dictatorship in 1836. But I’m not mean-spirited like that.

– 1850, “Nathaniel Hawthorne’s novel The Scarlet Letter was published.” … And life hasn’t been the same since for bored high schoolers and girls named Hester.

– 1935, “Adolf Hitler cancelled the military clauses of the Treaty of Versailles” … due to bad grammar. Of course I could just be making fun of the HNN entry, because the NYT says “Hitler scrapped the Treaty.” If I’d chosen to cite the latter, I would’ve just joked about the Treaty’s blue-book value.

– 1994, “Figure skater Tonya Harding pleaded guilty in Portland, Ore., to conspiracy for covering up the attack on rival Nancy Kerrigan.” … Have you seen pictures of Harding recently? She’s no cute has been, like Peggy Fleming, Dorothy Hamill, or Kristi Yamaguchi. She always looks pale so it’s not the tanning beds.

– 1998, “The Vatican expressed remorse for the cowardice of some Christians during the Holocaust, but defended the actions of Pope Pius XII.” … I’m a member of the corporate body in question here, but this statement makes the action look like obtuse gymnastics. … Is that, by the way, a mixed metaphor? What does one call gymnastics “gone wrong?” Tumbling? – TL

[Sources: HNN, NYT]

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